Election Aftermath: Advice for My UK Brothers and Sisters from a Yankee Muslim

The Conservatives have won and now you face the aftermath. I believe that your situation mirrors the situation of US Muslims after Trump’s win in 2016. Here are the key things that happened around that time in the US to the Muslim community that very possibly are also going to happen in the UK, so it would be good to prepare for it.

1. In the US, liberal, secular, social justice, and leftist Muslims in general were greatly strengthened by Trump’s win. These Muslims, many of whom are very tenuously Muslim in the first place, if at all, came to the forefront because they spoke the most aggressively and stridently against Trump. These activists loudly shouted “Islamophobia!” and “Minority rights matter!” and “Trump is a mother$#^@!” 24/7, and unfortunately, some imams bought into this rhetoric, naively thinking this kind of activism was for the benefit of the Muslim community.

So these imams gave religious legitimacy to these activists and we are still suffering the consequences of this. It has caused great damage to the iman of the community because figures like the LGBT-marching, transgender-party-dancing, music-video-singing, Sharia-denouncing Ilhan Omar were praised from the minbar (!) and literally likened to anbiya by gullible imams! Don’t be surprised if an analogous “Muslim” figure comes to prominence in the UK in coming years, someone who will make Sadiq Khan look devout in comparison.

2. Regardless of whether you think voting is permissible or not, there is one big consequence of mobilizing electoral participation from the minbar. And that is: Political activism becomes a religious activity in the eyes of the community. This is a disaster, partly because it leads to point 1, but also, more significantly, because it drains the religious energy of the community. What do I mean by this? Every Muslim has a certain amount of energy to devote to `ibada, has a certain amount of money to give to sadaqa, has a certain amount of attention span to devote to listening to Islamic sermons/lectures/etc. But if political activism is understood as having religious merit and the community has been hearing about “how critical” elections are and how much the survival of the Ummah depends on a certain political party being in office, then they will dedicate a big portion of those religious energy reserves into politics.

So rather than volunteer for the masjid or volunteer time and money for dawah purposes, they will pour that time, money, and attention to a political party! In the US, masajid and non-political Islamic orgs are finding a dearth of volunteers and donations have decreased noticeably. The only way these religious organizations can generate excitement from a significant portion of their congregation now is if they become political and start giving khutbas about Trump or Ilhan or whatever recent political issue. The only way they can get enough people to come to their fundraisers is if they invite some social justice activist in a turban hijab or kufi to give the keynote. Alhamdulillah, this is not every masjid or every local Muslim community. But it is too many of them. And some imams now deeply regret their push for political participation, making voting wajib or otherwise religiously significant, because it has directly undermined them in the long run. They shot themselves in the foot in the truest sense of that expression.

3. The other consequence of points 1 and 2 is a renewed push to compromise on Islamic principles. You might very soon see some claim that the reason the islamophobic Conservatives won is because Muslims are not pro-LGBT enough, not pro-abortion enough, not pro-interfaith enough, etc. They will make their rhetoric as hyperbolic as possible. They will claim that “WE ARE GOING TO BE THROWN INTO CONCENTRATION CAMPS if we do not compromise on these issues!!!” They will use this fear-infused language to step by step get the community to move away from clear, established Islamic norms. And then the imam friends of these activists will chime in with MASLAHA and MAFSADA and say dumb things like, “Well, the pro-LGBT activists have a good point because the alternative is clearly concentration camps.” And if you are so bold as to oppose this agenda of watering down Islam, be prepared to be branded a blind, backwards, right-wing bigot who is aiding the fascists!

4. In the US, we also noticed a big shift in acceptable community discourse. This probably will have the most long term impact, Allahu `alam. But what is being taught on the minbar in 2019 is often very different from 2015. In 2015, it was possible for the khatib to talk about hijab and proper attire and interaction between the sexes, it was possible to promote certain traditional positions that went against the modernist liberal milieu. But those ideas and positions have essentially been blackballed at many masajid and if you continue to preach them, you will be blackballed as well.

I know a recent graduate of a prestigious Islamic university that was interviewing for an imam position at different masajid. He was shocked that the masjid boards were telling him in advance what topics he could or could not speak about in his khutbah. Topics like hijab, LGBT, other religions, anything that might sound “harsh,” i.e., not conformant to liberal feminist sensibilities, etc., were completely prohibited. Of course, most cases are not as overt as this. Many imams probably shifted their discourse without even realizing it because the atmosphere and sensibilities of their congregations have changed significantly because of points 1, 2, 3. The bottom line: parts of Islam are not being conveyed to the next generation, at least in some communities. Those parts won’t be conveyed to the generation after that, and so on, which means that their Islam is being fundamentally distorted for generations to come. This is a big problem.

5. The image of what it means to be a good Muslima has been completely distorted for many in the US. A “good” Muslima now is supposed to be loud and belligerent, running in front of men, demanding to be put on stage, demanding to be put on every board, insisting on leading men, demanding to be seen front and center. And if you make a peep against this, you are a violent, misogynistic abuser and oppressor of women at worst. At best, you don’t understand the “sacred Prophetic tradition” and other such nonsense.

Very probably, you might see clones pop up in the UK of the obnoxious leading ladies we have here in the US. If these clones follow their Yankee counterparts, expect parts of your community to become feminized and emasculated in the worst ways. It is really up to the Muslim sisters in the UK not to fall for this. Just because some activist wears cloth on her head does not mean she believes what you believe or even cares about what Islam teaches. For the sisters, you have a responsibility to reject such people and make it clear to your imams, husbands, fathers, and children that these women do not represent you nor appeal to you in any way.

6. It is easy to fall into the trap of thinking that just because a conservative party won, that means the majority of people in the country are “islamophobic” and want to kill Muslims. This is the narrative that some will quickly push, but don’t believe it. Most people in the country in the US and UK know very little about Islam and even for those that actively don’t like Islam, Muslims occupy a small part of their overall priorities. Only a fringe minority nowadays operate on the political premise of “Muslims are a cancer and must be excised at all costs.”

So it is misleading and potentially dangerous to mischaracterize the majority of non-Muslims as thinking in that frame because it leads to the hyper-fear mentality mentioned in point 3. It also impedes dawah because some might think, “Why invite racists and rabid bigots to Islam?” You have some Muslims in the US who now believe that is is unacceptable to have anything other than a belligerent attitude to white people because, “White people voted for Trump and that means they’re fascists.” It escapes them, of course, that fascists are worthy of dawah as well, but this makes no sense in the identity-politics-addled minds of social justice activists.

These are the trends I have seen in the past few years in the US context. Nothing here is inevitable. It is up to the UK community and its leadership to recognize these possibilities and take steps to prevent them. But that will take hard work and, sometimes, bitter confrontations. But it is your duty to do what you can and, in the end, it is worth it inshaAllah.

May Allah protect you, my brothers and sisters, in the UK and elsewhere and guide you to what is best.

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26 COMMENTS

  1. The rise of Trump in America, Boris in the UK, and Modi in India should slap these Muslims out of their sleep from around the world.

    Not only Muslims but also Islamophobes and the caved in, mentally castrated moderates and exmuslims. How do they explain any of this? These people arent reading the “KOOORAAAN”. These are the people of the “peaceful” non-shariah based religions and ideologies.

    These are the so called major secular democracies, all about: MUH FREE DUMBS, MUH WOMEN RIGHTS, MUH EQUALITY, MUH GIRLS EDUCATION, MUH TOLERANCE, MUH DIVERSITY etc.

    All exposed. All meaningless. No substance. So fragile.

    MUH TOLERANT DEMOCRACIES in shambles.

    Imagine a rabbid dog like Bill Maher being nervous and anxious… cuz you know, civil war n shieeeet. What happened there buddy?

    According to the ethnic religious majorities of these nations voting Right wing parties, the only way these secular concepts gets passed is through subversive means by parasitic “globalists”. That this is all the handy work of external forces using fringe internal proxies. All of these concepts are through manipulation not by choice.

    Sounds alot like what those crazy radical extremists use to say in Muslim nations before they got deplatformed, sentenced torture, and then became violent….

    WAIT…wait..wait…its like its all happening all over again..except now in these non Muslim non Shariah non KOORAAN based countries. Full circle.

    Anyways…Muslims have nothing to worry about. We are not orphans, Alhamdulillah. Our patriarchal forefathers fought tooth and nail to give us homelands. So we dont get holocausted because there is no place to send. THANK YOU TURBAN WEARING BIG BEARDED PATRIARCHS. Thank you.

    And now that you see the circus for what it actually is, please try not to participate in ruining those nations in any way shape or form. Allah SWT plans, trust the plan.

  2. Take it with a pinch of salt as it’s loosely assembled personal opinions based on personal observations, but what I envision for the next 20-25 years is as follows:

    1. The Islamophobia trend (hating the mainstream Muslim the same way they hate ISIS) can’t sustain in Western politics and media for long. It has reached its peak and will be on a downward slope now.

    2. Those liberal, feminist, social justice, left-wing, activists et al will do the bidding for the non-extremist non-terrorist Muslim majority, as they have been doing for a fair bit now, and string them along on their side (slyly feeding them LGBT acceptance, female imam imposition, Qadiani acceptance etc. and causing some/many people to become heretics or apostates), as your article mentions explicitly or implicitly.

    3. The right wing will still roll in bed with the tyrants of the Middle East.

    BUT

    4. Both the left and right see China as a new rising threat. The media is already overly concerned over the plight of the poor, oppressed, Uighur Muslims. It’s so benign and compassionate it makes us cry. This will certainly gain traction.

    5. Their problem is not communism per se, but rather another power house that threatens their interests. With China out of the way, the last few remaining communist nations will be North Korea, Cuba, Vietnam, and they can be dealt with in due time, but China is the major thorn in the eye for now.

    6. Focus on points 2 & 3 again. On home ground the liberals and the leftists would have groomed the Muslims into support for their democracies and solidified their love for the west. In the Muslim world, the handicapped tyrants would be more than willing all over again to be a proxy to fight the west’s war against China. For this end, they have already started to dictate what the acceptable social discourse is to be (Daniel’s article point 4). Daniel is talking about acceptable mimbar talk in the west. I’ve got news for you guys – this is a serious issue in the East too! Now in Ramadan during the witr prayers, you just can’t hear prayers against the Christians and Bani Isarel (as is Sunnah and as was done in the 80’s and 90’s). The imams are not allowed to. You can’t talk about the evils of intermingling on the mimbar because it can cause people to dislike the establishment and therefore turn “Ikhwani”. There’s a long list of things that can and can’t be spoken about from mimbars.

    7. The west will then pit their well trained and well assembled army of mujahideen fi sabeeli amreeka* against China. *As mentioned in my point 6; amreeka is mentioned loosely, the implication is west. To those who remember, yes, it will be just like the Afghan-Soviet war all over again. However, this new breed of mujahideen will be a bit more white collar than the Afghans of the 80’s, in that they will be accepting female imams and LGBT parades and so on. The ordinary foot soldier in the Afghan war might have had good intention personally and not have realized he’s being used by the US and its allies. That won’t be the case this time around.

    8. Of course, Iran is a wild card in all of this, and I personally think it is a dormant asset of the US, whose current function is to maintain the balance of power in the “Persian” Gulf. They will activate it if and when they need to, and for what, I do not know. If they were anti-Iran, they would have taken good care of them during the Iraq war itself, and not let current Iraq operate as an Iranian proxy.

    9. Pakistan will need to re-assess its situation in all of this. If they go pro-China in a bid to scare India away, they might hurt themselves long run. If they want to get America on their side (which will still manage India a fair bit on their behalf, just as China would), they have to prove themselves as a more loyal slave to the US than India. Besides, all their puppet masters in the Middle East are themselves US puppets.

    Anyway – the bottom line is – the average Muslim on the street is going to have his a^qidah corrupted very badly in all of this. Real Islam and real Islamic discourse will be confined to some homes and some masajid and some imams’ circles as was the case in communist Russia, early kemalist Turkey and many other places. But his safety won’t be compromised, at a personal level (actual physical safety) or at a social level (ostracizing him and blackballing) in the name of Islamophobia, as long as he marches with the gays and feminists.

    Liberal secular democracy is the new communism – as far as Islam is concerned.

    Allahu aa^lam.

    • “1. The Islamophobia trend (hating the mainstream Muslim the same way they hate ISIS) can’t sustain in Western politics and media for long. It has reached its peak and will be on a downward slope now.”

      Depends on who the WASP populations are going to be replaced by. The West is aging rapidly and they aren’t reproducing in sufficient numbers (Feminism has decimated white birthrates). Demographics are going to shift drastically. In the US the large alternative groups are: Catholic Latino’s, Atheist Chinese and Hindu Indians.

      The first two seem to be somewhat indifferent regarding Muslims. Hindu Indians are problably one of the most anti-Muslim groups worldwide. I would rate groups hostile to islam and Muslims in the West as follows:

      1. right wing Jews (the Islamophobia industry is largely a product of this group), see: Ben Shapiro, Milo Yiannopoulos, Ezra Levant, Daniel Pipes, Pamela Geller, Laura Loomer, Dave Rubin, David Horowitz, Dave Rubin, Nina Rosenwald etc. etc.

      2. Iranian/Persian nationalists. People posing as ex-‘Muslims’ are often from this group. These people have barely been practising Shi’a, let alone Muslim.

      3. Hindu nationalists

      Competition for elite positions between the highly educated and skilled Chinese and Indians is going to increase. And so is indentity politics in general. As the country is going to shift from a country with a clearly defined and dominant culture (WASP) to a country more culturally fragmented. This can go both very wrong or pretty right depending on who the new political and economic elites are going to be.

      • In the WASP UK demographics will also make a difference, though the vast majority will remain the increasingly angst-ridden nervous hysterical elderly WASPs.
        The knee-jerk antagonistic racial minorities will the primarily Hindu Indians, Romanians, Poles, Christian Africans, Jews & Lithuanians. Others such as Afro-Caribbeans, Filipinos & South Americans could flip depending on conflict for scarce resources & jealousy/ social cooperation on the streets.

        The pagan Hindutvadi & Khaybari Zionist alliance is increasingly dominant on the levers of power.

        The Sri-Lankan Tamils & Sikhs are also rising.

        The young Muslims, historically primarily poor relatively uneducated South Asian Pakistani Kashmiris have great numerical influence within their age cohort, rising educationally & spreading into historic urban white working class vocations. Relatively they have a greater overt confident in their faith, though the diversity Borg culture is assimilating & hollowing out depth of non P.C. separateness.

        Elite careers are seeing many young Muslims entering the fray due to their relative numerical strength, Alhamdulillah e.g. Muslims outnumbering Hindus in many medical courses, which is a real visual proof.

        Unfortunately Neo-Con Z is baring its fangs unafraid to show its once hidden raw fangs, power & ability to cow down upstarts a la 1857 Indian Mutiny or Kiplings Fuzzie-Wuzzies.

        The Somalis are descending into petty crime & assimilating urban Black “culture”, though Abdi is partially soft power Islamising them too.

    • There are many duas or things you can include in your prayer. Why should we include prayers AGAINST Christians & Jews? This is very insulting & doesn’t help us. Already non-Muslims have “caught” or “recorded” imams at Western mosques making such prayers (which are obviously insulting & hurtful to them) as ammunition that Muslims really hate them, wish for their death & destruction… the whole nine yards. We are better off praying for Muslim majority countries, many of which are cesspools & oppressed Muslims instead of wishing hostility on others, turning them away from Islam.

      • ***Why should we include prayers AGAINST Christians & Jews?***

        It is from the Sunnah of the Prophet and his companions.

        Interestingly, it just reached me today that the imams in Middle Eastern mosques are not allowed to pray in congregation against anyone other than Bashar or Iran. Even their prayers need to be approved. (Previously, they could do government approved prayers against the children of Israel)

        ***Already non-Muslims have “caught” or “recorded” imams at Western mosques making such prayers (which are obviously insulting & hurtful to them) as ammunition that Muslims really hate them, wish for their death & destruction… the whole nine yards.***

        I’ve got news for you. They are well aware of Quran and hadith better than you.

        Read the verse 2:120

        You can shut up thinking that they will go soft on you, but they know verses like 62:5 and many ahadith.

        It’s not just firebrand imams and mullahs they’re after. They outright want to ban the Quran, Hadith and Islam itself.

        That’s why you have all these so-called imams tripping over themselves trying to offer their masters “alternative facts” on Islam.

      • Brother do you know al-Fatiha? The last line (aya 7) is literally a dua against the deviance in which the Jews and Christians have fallen.

        “صِرَاطَ الَّذِينَ أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيْهِمْ غَيْرِ الْمَغْضُوبِ عَلَيْهِمْ وَلَا الضَّالِّينَ”

        The maghdoob (those who’ve earned wrath) are the Jews. The dahleen (gone astray) are the Christians.

        Should we stop reciting al-Fatiha because it might offend the kuffaar. From their perspective you as a Muslim are a kafir in regard to their religion. They respectively call you a gentile/goy or heathen.

  3. *****You can’t talk about the evils of intermingling on the mimbar because it can cause people to dislike the establishment and therefore turn “Ikhwani”.*****

    You can’t talk about the evils of intermingling because the establishment is actively promoting it right now. So if you put 2 and 2 together, and come to the conclusion that the establishment is promoting fawahish, you’d morph into an Ikhwani monster! Likewise, you can’t speak against cinemas and night clubs. Happy days.

  4. The dos and don’t of Muslim in the USA, UK or other different parts of western countries.
    But what puzzle me always, why to bother? Why Muslim to bother about this contemporary situation of Islam in west?
    Thinking and trying in-the-box on western formula would just keep sinking the Muslim in west into quicksand.
    Muslim in west should continuously keep searching for a chance to move into any Muslim populated country. Yes, its true – in many cases its almost not possible, when you have issues like “citizenship, passport, visa, work-permit” etc. And, its also true that, without all those, every single weapon in every border will put their target on you.
    But, that would not let a Muslim to justify their luxury living in western society. The west is nothing but the Prophet Muhammad’s (s) prophecy of the world at the end time,
    – one side will apparently like Jannah, easy living, everything you need for your comfort is just infront of your door. Exactly like current western world.
    – on the other side its Jahannam, everything is a mess, hard struggle to collect the simple daily needs, on every scale of success they all scores at the bottom. Are exactly replicate most of the Muslim territories exists in current world.
    And as Prophet (s) warned, Muslim should not choose that Jannah in exchange of their Eemaan.

    • True. The West is a huge Potemkin village. People are constantly stressed out about work and indebted despite being overqualified and/or overworked. This is why people are chronically depressed and using drugs – either illegal or prescriptive. The outside indeed looks nice, but the inside is almost totally dysfunctional.

    • You have made an excellent point. Most(or all?) Muslim countries are cesspools one way or another, be it staggeringly high unemployment, lack of employment mobility, horrendous lack of research, bad healthcare, domestic violence, rampant filth & pollution etc.

      We Muslims don’t really do anything to improve our Muslim countries. A Muslim’s taxes in a Western country likely goes towards abortion, contraception & single parents all which are the causes & effects of fahisha one way or another. Then, the children of countless Muslim immigrants & migrants become total atheists, watered down/milquetoast Muslims or apathetic(mostly agnostics).

      We will certainly be asked on the Day of Judgment over such choices & actions.

  5. Jazakallaho Khayr Brother Daniel. Your voice of reason and Islamic knowledge is saving my life. I am made to be looking like a strange crazy hallucinating person by my muslim husband. He always puts me down when I try to point out this very same hypocrisy of the “Muslim leaders” (like you mention in this article) and says I am dumb because I don’t understand these so-called muslim political figures. I am very grateful to you. Your articles keep me sane. Baraka Allaho Fik Brother.

    • ***I am dumb because I don’t understand these so-called muslim political figures.***

      Ask him to explain these political figures and how they comply with Islam.

      Take him to a qualified shaykh who doesn’t salivate over western values in the name of Islam, and let him talk to your husband.

      • Thank you brother Ahmad for your reply. I even showed him Daniels articles on this very topic. He did say he agrees that these political figures don’t comply with the deen of Islam. But they are doing the right thing from a political position to protect the Muslims. And his argument gets pretty twisted and heretical as he suggests that the Prophet Muhammad SAWS would have done this same very thing, Astaghfirullah. I have to mention my husband is a very intellectual man with many diplomas including a PHD and he reads Quran in Arabic. But he is a convert and he is white American. He believes in the bizarre idea and the fear tactic that they are working to protect the rights of Muslims as well as the rights of the enemies of Islam. I do not understand his position, to tell you the truth. The only truth that I know is Allah is the Only Hafiz. And the wrath of the jahannam, Aa’oodhu Billah, is the only thing that every Muslim should seek protection from. This dunya is so short and basically an illusion and our deeds is what we are to answer Allah for. These politicians are forgetting that these fahisha’s publicity and promoting is the biggest threat to our muslim youth and society in general. I would rather die in the way of Allah than give up my deen for a lie. And how do I know if I will even live one second after this message or even get to finish it? do not believe for a second that the likes of Ilhan is a true Muslim. Yes thank you for your nasiha brother. I will have to look for An imam. It is hard to find a God fearing one these days believe me. It saddens me deeply to learn my husband thinks this way Subhanallah! I married him for the sake of Allah and thought he converted by choice. I never even talked to him about Islam or suggested Islam to him. I view marriage as a convenant with God. I feel betrayed and living with someone against Allah’s Will. I feel terrible. We have 2 grown kids together.

      • Sister, don’t be disheartened. It’s not just your husband. There are many Muslims in that thinks like this. In fact Daniel is in the minority here. Especially when the famous imams and scholars are seen promoting such venues. Even with Phds they all get their information from the same controlled sources.

        As concerning your husbands views are to you, you have to remember that there are Muslims sisters in Muslim nations whose husbands are supporting occupying forces, implementing these very things in Muslim majority societies. Yet are juggling their lives as Muslim families due to the circumstances they are in.

        Entire nations made up of Muslim fathers, husbands, brothers, sons working with non-Muslims to slaughter Muslims wholesale giving them path ways, air space, logistics so on n on. The same Muslims chanting against Hindus and Chinese but slaughter their own demanding Shariah Law. Where are the “perfect” Muslims?

        What I am trying to say is don’t be stressed. You seemed like this is having a heavy toll on you. May Allah SWT make it easy for you. Pray for your husband, family, and the rest of us. These are testing times for all.

        Wasalaam

      • Sister Rabia

        May Allah make it easy for you, your husband, and children, and guide you to the right ways.

        May He keep you steadfast on Islam and grant you life and death both on Islam.

        If you can read Arabic, I would suggest you to please get a book on apostasy (written by classical scholars) and read it and understand it, and also teach your husband and children if possible.

        Apostasy is such a serious topic, our classical scholars have written entire books on the sayings and actions that constitute apostasy.

        Sadly in today’s world, specially in the west, but even in the elite circles of the East, apostasy rulings of Shariah are being made light of and people are being told not to be worried about it.

        Hadith regarding these times tell us that a person will be Muslim in the morning and got to bed kafir at night and vice versa.

        No one is immune from the trap of satan, be it convert or born Muslim. Fake scholars say all sorts of things, making light of the necessity to keep one’s faith safe.

        If there’s one thing you can do, morning and evening everyday, recite the shahada <<<>>> as a precautionary measure in case some kufr was committed/uttered. If you can convince your husband of the same thing, that will be all the better and excellent.

        I once gave told a modern hipster shaykh in the west to dispense this advice to people and he felt repulsed at the idea of telling people to renew their iman. He said people read the shahada anyways during prayers and so on. I said that saying it as a force of habit is not at all the same thing as saying it with the intention of becoming Muslim or renewing one’s Islam. He was repulsed that I could doubt the faith of so many people and even suggest something like this. I stressed on the words “precaution” and “safeguard” but to no avail.

        By the way, this is something my own teacher also taught me and does himself, and this is something I do as well as much as I can (not twice a day as per the advice of shaykh, but still I try to do) and also teach to anyone I can.

        Remember, just as burglars like to rob the affluent, satan too likes to rob those who have faith. We need to be very watchful of all things we value and we don’t value anything more than Islam.

        Salams.

  6. This is probably not the kind of reply you were looking for, but in this situation you can’t blame anybody but yourself. At first you are right in that many Muslims support public figures that advocate for practices antithetical to Islam. You imply that you are very pious and insist you care more about Islam than anything else. Yet you first bash a convert to Islam, covertly implying he is defective as a person and as a Muslim just because he is white American. Given that, why the heck did you marry a white guy? And also you even reveal that you knew him and suggested that you extensively talked to him before he even converted to Islam. If you really care only about Allah and your Imaan then why would you flirt around with guys who are not even Muslim when you could have married a guy who like you is a brown Muslim from a similar background? There have been tons of Muslim guys in the western world for decades so I doubt that you didn’t know any. You can’t just expect the people around you to suddenly change if your own life priorities have changed, assuming that was the case. You put yourself through these types of situations, either committing sins or coming close to committing sins, clearly not prioritizing Allah and the truth the whole time. And then you make yourself out to be some type of a victim and blame people other than yourself for not having very strong Imaan. Sure a lot of Muslims suck these days and no one should support imams and speakers that advocate for haraam practices. But it looks like you are no exception.

    • My personal rule for anyone contemplating marrying a convert, any convert – male or female, of any color, background or ethnicity, is this –

      Marry a convert who converted to Islam solely on his/her own and has been Muslim for at least an year and has been trying to be a better Muslim – before you have met him/her in your life.

      Actually, that applies to nonpracticing born Muslims too. Don’t expect anyone to transform after marriage. Marry someone who is already in the state you envision them to be in before you’ve even met them.

      But things happen and people regret and repent. As Muslims, we believe the doors of repentance are always open lest one see the angel of death or sees the sun rising from the west.

      Allah help us all.

      • True. For women I would add: marry a man who’s more pious and knowledgeable than you. Your husband is going to influence you more than visa versa. Your household is going the direction your husband is going to take it. I’ve seen this time and again: when the husband is pious the wife usually follows – even if it takes a few years she will follow. A weak husband will generally also weaken the imaan of his wife. Because women are more social and emotional they tend to be more impressionable. Choose your captain wisely.

        Another thing: marry someone from a similar cultural background. Culture is real. Don’t think too lightly about this. You have to be able to speak each other’s language fluently, both literally as well as figuratively.

      • @Akh Not only Muslim women but also the Muslim men should heed that advice probably more so.

        Most “ethnically exotic” lost children of Muslims in the system (many in the sex industry) are the product of a Muslim father and his non-Muslim or revert partner who leave and take the kids with her.

        Some of these fathers resort to kidnapping or “honor killing” their children to protect their “honor”. Like what were they expecting?!?

        I agree with your advice, but it should be for both.

      • Agreed. Cultural similarity should go for both male and female. Many children coming from these ambiguous homes tend to develop a weak identity. They feel they neither belong here nor there. Causing all sorts of problems down the line. I mentioned it because i’ve noticed this mixing hype going on since a few years. Once those lovey dovey feelings wear off divorce is around the corner. Of course religion should be primary but ‘adaat en taqaleed should be taking seriously into consideration.

        Some women prefer converts – specifically white converts – because they see them as easy, less strict and more permissive.

  7. I just want to add, for the benefit of the other sisters, a very highly anti-feminist and politically incorrect ruling of Islam.

    Those interested can check the fiqh books of ANY Sunni madhhab by any classical scholar. This will win me the ire of the internet and all feminist Muslims who visit this site. Alhamdulillah for this ni^mah.

    A convert is NOT a kufw of a born Muslim female.

    And “convert” status lasts for 3 generations.

    So if person A converted to Islam, his great-grandson will be counted a “born Muslim” and any generation before thisit will be considered a “new Muslim family.”

    A convert is the kufw of a convert girl only.

    Let me clarify, this is not calling them lesser Muslims or saying it is haram to marry them.

    Kafa’ah is about suitability and compatibility for a smooth marriage. The same thing that Akh mentioned regarding same culture and language and emotional compatibility.

    If any over-smart sister from the US thinks I’m badmouthing her convert fiance or friends, let her know I’m talking only about suitability and compatibility. This sister will be the first one to go “ewwww” at the mildest suggestion of marrying a FOB (fresh off the boat new immigrant) brother, let along a brother from back home; and I support this, because it is about suitability and compatibility in a long lasting marring.

    Guess what? A convert is “FOB” into Islam.

    Kafa’ah is seen for the girl. Not the man. If a girl’s wali is giving his daughter to you, it’s his wish.

    We Muslims protect our daughters and sisters more than anything else considered valuable to anyone from the west.

    It just hit me as I typed this comment! If there’s one group of Americans who are more anti-immigrant than Trump and Trumpists – it’s 2nd gen Muslims who are repelled by legally migrated FOB Muslims! How’s that for a rude awakening?!

  8. Thank you everyone for replying, and thank you for all the nasihas given here. I have to correct one thing. I did not put down my husband by saying he is a convert. I wanted to state the background where he is from. Because it does matter. Coming from a family who doesn’t believe in God actually and having lived a culturally appropriate American life. I was very young myself when I married him. And I didn’t have anyone to guide me on how to choose a husband. I just trusted he was a good person and a good Muslim.
    Thank you brothers @Ahmad and @Proud for your compassionate words. And thank you brother Ahmad for suggesting the book about apostasy. And also renew the shahada. I do it. It is Alhamdulillah what really helps me. I also do istighfar 100 times a day. I teach my kids too. I never knew these things before. My father didn’t teach me nor did my mother. Allah Guides me Alhamdulillah. I had to look for answers. Alhamdulillah. Baraka Allaho Fik Brother for your duas. May Allah Protect you and Grant you His Khayrat. Truly humbled.

  9. JazakumAllah khairan to those give positively inclined commentary to assist us as we navigate these uncharted waters. If not identical, there may be some templates of “convergent evolution” between the 2 WASP nations.

    I was always aware of the Fool’s Gold of falling in bed with the apparently sympathetic Wolf in sheep’s clothing of the Deen of “Leftist” politics against our core beliefs, even though the “Rightists” tend to be more obvious threats to our fundamental existence in society.

    We can learn from one another & history…

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