Narcissism is a pathology of the self. If you have ever studied the personality disorder of narcissism, you know it has certain classic hallmark features. Thinking about it more deeply, I’ve realized lately that feminism and narcissism share many core features.
A narcissist is a person who has key pathological aspects to their personality structure:
1. An exaggerated sense of self-importance
3. Lack of empathy for others
4. Victim complex
5. Requires a convenient scapegoat
Now let’s see how well the ideology of feminism matches up with the pathology of narcissism.
1. Exaggerated Self-importance:
Feminism teaches women that they are all important, that their needs and wants override the needs of others. Women are placed at the center of all things. Women are the metric by which everything else is measured and judged. Based on how such-and-such society “treats women,” we can judge it to be good or bad. Based on how this or that country “respects women’s rights,” we can deem it to be good or bad. Everything revolves around women and their feelings and whims. Women are “queens” who “slay.” In essence, feminism teaches female supremacy.
Psychologists call this mindset of delusions of grandeur the narcissist’s “grandiosity.” Feminism teaches women to have grandiosity, an inflated ego. In Islam, the word for this is كبر (kibr, arrogance).
Feminists are women who are entitled. Feminism teaches women, who are “queens,” to demand their “rights,” which are in reality not their rights at all. As Muslims, we recognize that the only true rights of any person are those rights set by Allah the Creator. Demanding more rights above and beyond what Allah has decreed for women (or for men) is injustice. Taking more than your due is wrong. But if you believe that you are special and superior to others, you demand more than your due. This is entitlement.
3. Lack of Empathy:
Feminism drills into its adherents the need to put themselves as women first, at all costs. The woman is special and is entitled to special rights and privileges and can have all the choices, regardless of the consequences of those choices on men, children, the family, or society at large. None of this matters. As long as the woman pleases herself at the moment and reaches her “potential” and “takes up space” and “smashes the glass ceiling” and is fully “strong and independent.” The suffering of her own children, or her husband, or her family, or of society is inconsequential in the mind of the self-centered feminist. Feminism indoctrinates women with not only fierce individualism but also an utter lack of empathy for anyone who isn’t a woman (read: another feminist).
I once told a female acquaintance about an article I had read about a woman who had killed her husband by decapitating him and then chopping off his genitals. I was aghast, and mentioned how disturbed I felt by that crime. My female acquaintance shrugged and replied nonchalantly, “So what? He probably deserved it. She was probably pushed to it by something he did! She wouldn’t have done that unprovoked. He got what he deserved.”
I was speechless. I had to pick my jaw up off the floor at her comment. Zero empathy.
4. Victim Complex:
This one is a no-brainer. If you have ever listened to a feminist or to a narcissist speak for any length of time, you can instantly note the similarity. There is a deep fixation on perceived slights, on imagined insults, on grievous “injustices.” The narcissist and the feminist are both masters at playing the victim in any and all scenarios.
They are long-suffering martyrs. They are perpetual victims, wronged constantly by others, and never wrong themselves. Nothing is ever their fault. If you try to point out something that a feminist could have done differently, the shrill answer comes back immediately, “You’re blaming the victim!!”
Feminism teaches women to see themselves as victims in all cases. This is also how the narcissist sees himself or herself. A person who is always the victim avoids all responsibility and all accountability for their own actions.
5. The Scapegoat:
If things are never the fault of the narcissist or the feminist, then whose fault is it?? *Somebody* must take the blame. But it can’t be the feminist (or the narcissist) because that would entail taking some personal responsibility for actions and having some accountability. We can’t have that.
So it becomes necessary to assign blame to someone. If women are the victims, then who are the oppressors? Someone has to victimize the victim for the victim to even *be* a victim.
It must be men.
Feminism teaches women that *men* are the enemy. Women are martyrs because men kill them. Women are the victims because men victimize them. Women face oppression, suppression, injustice at the hands of men as a collective across time and space because of one keyword: THE PATRIARCHY!
The most perfect scapegoat for all of the women’s problems is this much-maligned patriarchy. Feminism teaches women to take no responsibility for any type of shortcoming and instead to expertly dodge any and all blame, and to project all blame onto men.
Putting all these pieces of the puzzle together, it becomes easy to see why women under the delusional indoctrination of feminism can so casually blame men for “rapes and wars” and so easily paint all men with the same careless brush. Men are the handy scapegoat.
Essentially, feminism teaches women narcissism, which is a pathology of the self.
May Allah grant us protection from both feminism and narcissism and make us righteous Muslims who have taqwa, Ameen.